Never before have I experience I phase like this. Even my years in HELP when I flunked an entire year did not demotivate me from completing my studies and my determination to graduate in something. I'm frustrated and bored with studying.

So far, I've only handed up 2 out of 10 assignments on time and it's a miracle I've been getting the scores I have. I take three days to read one journal when it is ideally three journals in one day. I'm overdue for my own personal deadlines, which then spills over to other things.

The pure truth is I'M SICK OF STUDYING. I was never an academic and I believe my strengths lay somewhere else, something I was looking forward to explore free-from the books I've only skimmed and never read..I'm amazed I've made it as far as I have with the lack of enthusiasm I have. The thought of dropping out or differing has lingered in my mind too often this semester and I could hardly blame myself. After years of telling myself "I'll put up with this till I get that cert", it becomes extremely depressing to tell that myself that a second time.

Ironically, it's the Australian culture which has contributed to this decay. Unlike before, I don't look at circumstances such as this as a barrier. I used to live with the mentality where "you gotta do what you gotta do", "it's a privileged so few have", "it's not about me, it's about something bigger" and a the general attitude of gratitude and appreciation that life is good for whatever form it is. Now I'm just hoping things are easy, things are supposed to go my way and suffering is meant to be wrong.  Damn, I'm messed up. This is why I wanna get out of here before I become "fat" and die.

Back to basics. I need to remember what God wants. Not only will my attitude for this will change, at the same time I'll be aware that life isn't about me (in the self centered way anyway). Self motivation is the exact thing that demotivates you, which means you gotta allow Someone who knows you best to do the motivating. The importance of a plan from the One above is always good because it is something which is real (usually not so fun and not so deceiving) and purposeful. I remember how I changed when I allowed God full control - everything matters, regardless of how good or bad they were. I want that ignorant , not so rational faith again.

I usually don't do reviews, but the latest Star Trek movie totally blew me away. I'm quite a trekkie, mostly focusing on series from The Next Generation, Voyager and Deep Space Nine. The 11th installment of the Star Trek movie is based on the characters from a series before those I am familiar with. Initially, I was quite grossed that they wanted to remake the original series, with a perception that the original cast - who are primary shareholders of the Star Trek franchise simply wanted a movie to reflect their long lost glory. Their shot with the latest series - Enterprise, which didn't last very long was proof of it. Anyway, the reviews on the web from CNN and Rotten Tomatoes changed my mind and boy, it was well worth it.

This movie is not just for the fans, although being one is a great bonus. Anyone can watch it. Even if you have no clue of what Star Trek is. For fans, I'd recommend you dig up the books and revise the facts, it would be more fun to watch (e.g. Who is Kirk's dad? How did Kirk become captain? etc). For non-fans, especially those with Star Trek stigma - I brought two of my housemates, one has no clue what Star Trek is and the other hates sci-fi altogether - they both enjoyed it.

The 11th movie is set before (or rather the day of birth of) James T. Kirk, the hero and icon of original franchise. Romulans from the future, distorts the timeline and seek to destroy the Federation (typical for everyone to destroy the most peaceful race. Why not destroy the Klingon Empire or Borg or something). The movie gives a fresh look at Star Trek, putting in more detail, relevance (in terms of technology) and pure humour. The cast selection was great! I mean, hello Sylar and Mr How to Make Friends and Alienate people!

Warning! Spoiler
The only regret I have from the movie was the fact that the Planet Vulcan was destroyed. Vulcan plays a huge HUGE HUGEEEE part in the Star Trek universe. I felt Spock's pain when it got sucked into the artificial black hole. Man.


I'll give this one a full 10/10.

They managed to give a fresh concept without distorting the essence and canon of Star Trek, realistic and quality special effects, good humour, good plot, off the scale action, good acting and fantastic selection of actors. This is a big one guys. Go watch it!